


Falling in Love is a Bitch

by bluekujira



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Cause it works out in the end, Kissing, M/M, Possibly Unrequited Love, This wouldn't happen if people communicated properly, but also not really, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-09
Updated: 2015-05-09
Packaged: 2018-03-29 16:49:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3903649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluekujira/pseuds/bluekujira





	Falling in Love is a Bitch

The first time it happens Derek is at his loft.  
Recently Derek’s been on edge more than he used to be. Now things have sort of calmed over for the time being. Well as calm as Beacon Hills can be. At least no one is in any immediate danger.   
The problem, though, is that Derek can’t help but feeling these twitches and twangs plucking away at his insides, as if he’s made of guitar strings.   
“Holy barnacles Batman!” Stiles yells, clutching the controller to his chest and shoving Scott to the side. Scott makes a noise of protest and Derek grunts in annoyance. The two best friends are once again making themselves comfortable in his loft. Stiles claims it has something to do with Derek’s TV having a good picture but Derek knows that every time there’s a cut scene in the game Stiles is looking at him. He wants to shove the kid’s face away. Sometimes he growls at him in a way that can only be interpreted as “leave me alone and stop staring”. And why is Stiles staring at him anyway? This is his loft. He can sit in his sweats and read his books any way he wants or pleases. It’s Stiles that’s barging.   
Derek wishes he’d stop looking at him like he wants him to leave him and Scott alone. Derek keeps quiet though and pretends like he’s fully focused on reading. Stiles doesn’t know that Derek looks at him too when he’s playing his game and can’t see. 

 

The second time it happens Derek is at the local diner by himself when he sees Stiles and the Sherif walk in. It’s like Stiles already knew Derek was going to be there because the moment he walks in his eyes find Derek’s. Derek grumbles although Stiles can’t hear him and looks away. The father and son take a seat at a table two spots down from Derek. The Sherif has his back to Derek and the whole time Derek can’t help but watch Stiles’s hands and mouth as he eats. He peaks, looking up through his lashes, trying not to be too obvious.   
Stiles doesn’t seem to notice and that irritates Derek. He feels a churching and an itching in his stomach.

 

The third time it happens Derek is sitting next to Stiles on Scott’s couch. It’s movie night but Scott had to leave them to bring his mother some dinner to the hospital because she’s working late again. Derek can hear the air whistle across Stiles’s lips as he laughs at a scene in the movie. Derek is rigid and tense and it’s taking all his energy not to move his hand over and intertwine his fingers with Stiles’s.   
He’s so stupid he wants to punch himself. Stiles asks him if he’s okay and he doesn’t realize he’s been grinding his teeth until he has to answer Stiles that yes he is fine.   
But he’s not fine. And he hasn’t been because what he thought was agitation and annoyance over Stiles was really a stupid lovesickness festering in his heart.   
He wants to tell Stiles he’s not fine because he won’t be fine until Stiles loves him the way Derek loves Stiles.

 

The fourth time it happens Stiles is kissing Derek. But he’s drunk. And Derek doesn’t know where to take this or what it means. He trembles when he kisses him back. He chokes on his breath in a gasp and doesn’t know what to do other than cup Stiles’s cheek and pull him closer.   
Stiles reeks of alcohol and Derek always pictured kissing him the first time to be different. He pulls away and doesn’t want to when Stiles makes that groan and god Derek has to leave.   
He hears Stiles call his name questioningly, even with concern.   
Derek doesn’t contact Stiles after that because he can’t bare to see him and feel the shame and anger when Stiles doesn’t remember or when Stiles tells him to forget about it, it was just a joke.

 

The fifth time it happens Derek is the more frightened than he’d ever been. And it’s pretty difficult to get him scared. He’d been ready to go to bed after trying to see how long he could stay up, but when he walks into his bedroom he hears a thump and immediately flicks on the light.   
Stiles has fallen in through his window and Derek wonders how the hell he even got to the window and how he hadn’t fallen to his death.   
“What the hell are you doing?” he asks, probably more monotoned than he’d meant it to be. Inside his heart is racing.   
What the hell was Stiles doing? Why was he here? Was he drunk again?  
“Derek…” Stiles rolls and flails around before standing up. He looks cold but he smells like night air and Derek just wants to walk across the room and pull him into his arms. “We need to talk.”  
The feeling plummets in his stomach and Derek backs towards the door.   
“We can talk in the morning. I’m going to sleep now.”  
“No we can’t. That’s too long of a time.”   
There’s too long of a silence stretching between them.  
“Well talk then,” Derek snaps.  
“Why did you run away?”   
Derek looks at him. Stiles doesn’t have to specify more than that. Derek knows what he’s talking about. He’s afraid to answer. He knows where this is going. He’s waiting for the let down.  
“I’m sorry,” Stiles apologizes.  
And it fucking hurts. Derek can’t believe it hurts this bad.   
“Just get out, Stiles.”  
“Derek you’ve gotta listen to me-“  
“I don’t want to, Stiles, don’t you understand that? I don’t want to hear anything you’ve got to say. You’ll only make things worse.”  
Stiles looks so taken aback, so shocked that Derek wants to apologize. He hasn’t done anything wrong. He hasn’t kissed Stiles in a drunken haze then asked Stiles to forget about it. Stiles hasn’t felt the same things Derek’s been lost in for the past weeks and months.   
He hears Stiles take in a breath and wonders if he’s going to cry. “You idiot,” Stiles growls.   
Derek looks up from the ground. “What-“  
“No. Derek you’re going to listen to me. I’m sorry- really… fucking sorry that I was drunk when I did that. I-I shouldn’t have been drunk. But I wanted to kiss you. For christ’s sake I’ve wanted to kiss you before I started making Scott play video games with me at your loft. And I’m sorry I kissed you when I was drunk because I should have done it when I was clear-headed, you know? And… And I should have done it when you wanted me to…”   
“You wanted to kiss me?”  
“Don’t make me repeat it Derek…” Stiles sighs, clearly frustrated. “I like you… like that.” He wrings his hands, looking like he doesn’t know what to do with himself, looking like he wishes he’d kept his mouth shut.   
When it happens Derek is ready for it. Those twangs there were just plucking are now strumming away at his insides. He’d been so worried saying anything to Stiles would fuck up the fragile relationship they have between them. It was… it was so relieving to know that nothing was actually fucked up at all.   
“Stiles…”  
“I’ll go,” Stiles responds quickly, walking past Derek.   
Derek catches his arm, tugging him back. He drops his hand, realizing he doesn’t want to force Stiles to stay. But at the same time he needs to say something.  
Speak now you moron. You really are an idiot.  
“I like you too Stiles.”  
Stiles gapes at him.  
“I wished you hadn’t been drunk when you kissed me. I wanted… I wanted it to be different, to be more sober, more ready and understanding. I wanted you to kiss me Stiles…” Derek finds himself unconsciously reaching towards Stiles, wanting to pull him back. “I want you to kiss me now.”  
Stiles doesn’t waste a second. His arms are wrapped around Derek’s neck, and Derek catches Stiles’s hips. They kiss awkwardly, teeth clacking. Stiles laughs and they correct themselves, kissing more gently, more cautiously this time.   
Derek isn’t even annoyed when Stiles makes cheesy comments against his lips. He isn’t even annoyed when Stiles breaks the kiss and tell him he knew it all along.   
“Can I kiss you again?” Stiles asks.   
Derek nods, welcoming him.   
No Derek isn’t annoyed. He’s just glad that the hard part of falling in love is already over. Looking back on it, he realizes that falling in love can be such a bitch.


End file.
